Sweet Song

A dear friend of mine read yesterday's blog and emailed this to me today. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvLp4sIamMo&sns=em

This song is perfect. I know I have heard it before, but it means so much more to me now. 

Thanks for the cry Kellie. 

On the Bright Side

I don't even know what to say really. Today has been crazy. I guess I'll just start at the beginning. 

About 2 am Dru woke up crying. I went in, changed her diaper, rocked her for a while.  As I was laying her down I either stepped on her feeding tube or it was caught on the IV pole; either way it was not pretty. Her entire tube came out and the tape snapped off her cheek. Poor little thing screamed and has an owie to prove it. 

On the bright side, we didn't replace her tube immediately and it was nice to see her without it for a little while. 

Once we were all up and moving this morning, we took Dru to UVRMC to get a blood draw. I ALWAYS hate this process. She always looks at me to save her and I have to wait til it's done to give her my comfort. 

On the bright side...she looks to me for comfort. As an adoptive mom that means the world to me. 

After we got home this afternoon, we had a phone call from Dru's birthmom. She is amazing. We are blessed that she chose us to be Dru's family. She is understandably concerned about Dru's condition. She feels guilty that we might feel cheated that we adopted a "bad baby". We put an end to that train of thought as quickly as possible. We are nothing but grateful that our angel found her way to our home. We are nothing but grateful that Dru's belly mom was led by God's hand to our family. Talking with her always brings up mixed emotions. I have a hard time sometimes knowing that one of my greatest joys came from another mom's greatest sorrows. 

On the bright side...little miss magic has 2 families that love her so much and shed tears for her often. 

After the phone call it was time to place a new feeding tube :/. We opted not to call home health and do it ourselves. Bill told me later that he had a feeling come over him that he should do it. AND HE DID!!!! I had a hard time watching her choke a little bit. I may or may not have shed a tear. 

On the bright side...Dru didn't cry at all!! I really honestly feel that if we had a nurse do it, that she would have been on high alert with a stranger and been in tears before anyone even touched her.  She is now sleeping soundly and peacefully. 

My girl is a rock star and she amazes me daily with her happiness and smiles.

Brought to my Knees

I have been thinking a lot about everything that has happened to our family in the past year. Just like everyone else there have been ups and downs. 

A year ago we began our adoption adventure. Anyone who has gone through this before knows that you feel hopeful and hopeless at the same time. I jumped everytime the phone rang, hoping it was THE call. 

We enjoyed our summer of watching our oldest play a lot of baseball. Watching him improve makes me so proud. 

Our youngest son went to a new teacher for preschool and I watched him slowly not be so dependent on me. (I had quit teaching to prepare for having a new baby)

We were lucky enough to be able to drive back to Tennessee to spend thanksgiving with Bill's parents. 

We got THE call a week before Christmas that our baby girl had found us and she was sleeping in her crib, in our home, 10 days later. And another blessing was that my best friend and Bill's parents were here visiting so they were able to meet Gracie-Dru. 

6 weeks after bringing her home, we were told that Little Miss Magic had biliary atresia. Her only option is a life-saving liver transplant. 

Of course we hadn't planned on this, and of course our world was turned upside down for just a little bit. And of course we are very focused on Dru and are very aware she has a disease. But that is not all we are focused on. 

We choose to focus on the fact that she is in a family that loves her. She has brothers that worry about her and cry when she's put through something no baby should have to endure. She came to a family that prayed non-stop for her before we even knew her. 

She came to a daddy that will protect her with everything he's got and wanted that daddy/daughter bond so badly that he put aside all doubts to make it happen. And it has happened already in such a short amount of time. 

She came to a mom that fought for her for years before she was even conceived. And I'm not about to stop now. We are a family of fighters :)

So please don't feel sorry for us. We are blessed. We are happy. We are hopeful. 

Yes, we have been brought to our knees many times. But never in despair, never in defeat. Always in gratitude. And we will continue to do so. 

That Hair!!!

When we adopted Dru, one of my biggest concerns was taking care of her hair. And funny enough it was one of  the things her belly mom was most worried about too. I vividly remember her saying "promise me you'll do her hair every night".  And I have. 

Even today when we had to fill a whole pantry shelf with her home health supplies, my biggest job was to make sure her hair was taken care of ;)

So Dru's African-American hair is crazy. But I love it. There are rules to taking care of it. I can only wash it once a week. When I do bathe her and get her hair wet, I have to comb conditioner through it. 

It's crazy long when it's pulled straight. 

Every night I put moisturizer in it and a leave-in conditioner any time during the day when it's looking dry. 

This hair care product line has saved our lives. Seriously makes for a fuss-free night when it comes to hair.   You can find it at curls.biz if you're  interested. They have baby care, girls, and women products. I am a customer for life. 

After I put everything in her hair, I twist it into little curls and let it dry overnight. In the morning I separate it into individual curls and Gracie-Dru can rock a baby fro.  

I am so grateful that at this point in Dru's illness, that my biggest worry is still her hair. It used to really stress me out, but now it's a sign that life goes on as normal. 

Picture Perfect

My good friend Jen is a fantastic photographer.  As a baby shower gift she gave us a "newborn" shoot for Dru.  Because of all the craziness with schedules we finally got together a couple weeks ago.


It's called a lifestyle shoot, and I loved it.  Nothing too choreographed.  Just me and my girl hanging out.  Next time maybe we will invite Dad. :)

Here are a few of my favorites.  To see more of Jen's work go  here

Live, Laugh and Love

We had another clinic visit today. It went well. Dru is stable. Her PELD score is now 18. We are moving up slowly but surely. 

Most days we spend in onesies and jammies, but when we go to primary's we put our best foot forward. 

Bows and dresses, and if we are really lucky, a smile after labs. It's bittersweet that she's getting so used to being poked that she hardly crys anymore. 

I have to say that she seems to be a bit more mellow since the feeding tube was placed. She's getting all her calories and not waking up as often to be fed in the night. That puts us all in a good mood. 

We were told today that we have a rocky road ahead. From here on out, Dru's health will fluctuate. The trick will be to catch her on a low to boost her PELD score, then "fix" her back to stable. 

We've got this. We are optimistic. We have each other. And a whole lot of extra support that we count as family too. 

In the meantime, we are going to do what we usually do. Live, laugh, and love. And tonight we get the added bonus of celebrating Trey's birthday. Can't believe I have a 13 year old!!!! Yikes!

Dru's first Easter

Our Easter was practically perfect. 

Everyone slept in because we were up late the night before. Dru doesn't wake up as often to eat since she has the feeding tube (it's the little things). 

The kids were all up and we began our yearly tradition of following the jellybean trail to the kids' baskets. 

After so much excitement, Dru took a nap so I went on my run. It's good meditation/prayer time for me. Easter is a holiday of hope and I definitely felt renewed hope for our family today. 

We relaxed a bit, then headed to my mom's for dinner and an Egg Hunt. The kids loved it. Dru seems to be much happier now that she is getting more calories, which equals more sleep for all of us. She even let others hold her and that is a big step. 

I am so grateful for the days that we can do our normal routine and traditions. I don't like to think long-term much anymore because that's when the what-if's start calling. We are learning to take each day minute-by-minute. That in itself is a blessing to our family. It's amazing to me how the little things in life make me the happiest.